Friday, April 4, 2014

Scribbles.

In the months I spent typing away on my laptop and hardly making notes by hand, I forgot my own handwriting. I forgot how I used to scribble my 'r's that made them look like 'v's and I forgot that I always made an effort to dot my 'i's and drop the tails of my big 'U's, just like Mr John told us to when we were eleven.

I forgot my handwriting to the point that I treated things I had written in the past as strangers and had to reintroduce my hands to my brain and my brain to my hands for the words to make sense again.

I didn't forget how bad it was though. How much I'd cringe at the prospect at having to show someone something I'd handwritten because it was just that awful. They didn't let me forget it either throughout school. Cakar ayam, they said. Chicken scratches on the ground. And it wasn't that I couldn't write neatly or prettily or nicely - I mean, I could if I really really really tried - but when your brain and hands have become the best of friends, they aren't quite as fussed about impressions anymore and just go about being themselves.

I hoped in the time it took for them to forget each other, they would forget what a mess they were when with each other. Like hey, maybe one day after not touching a pen for five months, I'd suddenly have writing that was neat and wasn't too hasty.. But nope! Words spilled out even quicker than before, more haphazard than usual, with the tail of my 'a' melting into the sides of my 's', with me pausing every now and then from underuse and strain, then going off again like a chicken scratching on the ground for the meal of its life.

So I thought, why fight it though?

My hands were hungry for paper and I guess, rather than force them from the friendship that was so close when journals were a staple and the keyboard was a mere acquaintance, from now up till exam time in slightly over a month, let them meet more often. So at least when I sit for my three hour papers all crammed up in one of the worst time tables LSE could have constructed, they’d be friends and hopefully, won’t surprise me with scrawls that even I don’t understand.

-x-

Went touristing for a short while that day and as usual, came home with too many photos.

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Nah, just kidding!

No such thing as too many photos on this blog. Winking smile

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